In the name of God, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful
Types of men in the hadith of Umm Zara’
My husband is Kalil Tihama
If the previous three types of men were bad
This is a good type of man
This is how life has good and bad
It is not correct to generalize one category to all people
Neither on men nor on women
Rather, generalizing in judging people is a kind of injustice
Whether it is generalized to the people of a country, a tribe, or others
It is not correct to say that all men are equal
It is not said that all women are equal
But in all good things
This is a good type of man, different from those before him
As the fourth woman describes him by saying:
My husband is Kalil Tihama
No heat, no bitterness, no fear, no poison
Abu Ubaid Al-Harawi, may God have mercy on him, said
She says he has no permission or harm
But this is like
Because both heat and cold have an ear when it becomes severe
No fear
She says there is no danger to him and no evil to fear
Nor boredom
She says he doesn't get bored with my company
Al-Asbahani, may God have mercy on him, said
Tihama nights are remembered for goodness
That is, he has no permission and no objection
Judge Iyad, may God have mercy on him, said
That is, it means that her husband is neither burdensome nor corrupt
Rather, it is sweet and sweet
Easy on the companion
Mastlan side
Ibn Hajar, may God have mercy on him, said
She described her husband as beautiful
Moderation of the situation and inner safety
It's like she said it
There is no harm or harm to him
I am safe from him
I am not afraid of his evil
He never gets bored and gets tired of my company
Or not bad manners
I am tired of being with him
I am happy to live with him
The people of Tihama enjoy their mild night
This woman described her husband eloquently
His good qualities were evident in him
What every woman desires in her husband
Every woman is happy to feel secure with her husband
This feeling comes because of the husband's actions
And check it out as well
Because of the husband's actions
A man threatening his wife with divorce is the most ridiculous reason
Or he frequently mentions divorce in front of her
He loses her psychological security
He lives it in constant fear
Because she is not safe from this aspect
It is not appropriate for a sane man to threaten his wife with divorce
At the slightest problem that occurs between them
Rather, a rational man does not mention divorce in front of his wife
It can only be released after all means have been exhausted
To solve his problem with her
After istikharah, consultation and deliberation
A woman feels safe with her husband
It is one of the most important factors for her happiness
It is a reason for her abundant giving and sacrifice for you
Dear man
So keep it and you will be happy
This feeling of security
This fourth woman described it
Three important descriptions in marital life
The first one
Men in dealing with the wife in marital life
The woman likened it to the night of Tihama
There is neither heat nor comfort
It means pretty moderate
This is how a man should be in his married life
He does not harm his wife in any way
Because she is his companion in this worldly life
Which he chose with his consent
And he fought to get her approval
He offered her money, gold, and gifts for her to accept
This hurt her further
He quickly needs it and can't do without it
Why should he upset her mind and disturb her soul?
The Prophet, may God bless him and grant him peace, forbade the man
About harming women early in the day
Then have sex with her at the end
On the authority of Abdullah bin Zamaa, may God be pleased with him
On the authority of the Prophet, may God bless him and grant him peace, he said
None of you should flog his wife like a slave
Then he has intercourse with her at the end of the day
Narrated by Al-Bukhari
Abu Abbas Al-Qurtubi, may God have mercy on him, said
This is a denial of the one who flogs his wife
And more than that until he treats her like a nation
Then it is easy after that
He goes back to fucking her
And to satisfy his desire for her
Do not obey him or be kind to him
You may hate him
Maybe he loves her
His condition deteriorates and their situation worsens
The mercy and affection that God Almighty established between spouses will disappear
And the opposite happens
With it, may God bless him and grant him peace
With this brief word
As for the evils that arise from that
Ibn Hajar Al-Asqalani, may God have mercy on him, said
And intercourse or intercourse
Rather, it is preferable to treat oneself and the desire to be treated with kindness
The flogged person often repels the one who was flogged
It was pointed out that this was condemned
He respected the Prophet, may God bless him and grant him peace
The woman was psychologically surprised to feel safe and reassured with her husband
He alerted the husband to the etiquette of dealing with women
And he does not treat women well
It is a body without a soul or feelings
A healthy woman only offers her body to those she loves
And in a state of complete psychological reassurance
The second one
Internal safety
Do not expect any form of treachery from him in marital life
And don't be afraid of that
This is the pinnacle of psychological safety in a woman’s life
To feel confident in her husband
Its interior, like its exterior, is clean and there is no treachery in it
The third one
Good company and good company never tire of them
This suggests to the woman that her husband loves her
Good company and good company only come from someone with good morals
Sitting with the wife for a long time is evidence of his love for her
This requires listening well
Because if he sat with her
I felt comfortable talking to him and felt comfortable with him
This is what the Prophet, may God bless him and grant him peace, did
In the hadith of Umm Zara’
He sat with Aisha
And chat with her
And listen to her carefully
Women have a role in eliminating boredom from married life with good treatment
Choose the topic of conversation
And renewal in her life, her clothing, and her home
Therefore, Omar bin Al-Aas said his beautiful words
I don't get tired of my animal as long as my feet carry it
Nor did my wife treat me well
Nor did my friend keep my secret
Boredom is one of the false morals
How are you, honorable man, with your wife?
Do you feel safe with you?
Do you long to sit with her?
Do you have the ability to listen to her without interrupting?
Even if she talked for a long time
We will continue in the future, God willing
Praise be to God, Lord of the worlds