1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:03,399 In the name of God, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful 2 00:00:03,399 --> 00:00:08,210 Men's items 3 00:00:08,210 --> 00:00:13,199 In the hadith of Umm Zara’ 4 00:00:13,199 --> 00:00:21,460 The lover's husband 5 00:00:21,460 --> 00:00:25,859 There is no time without a woman suffering from her husband 6 00:00:25,859 --> 00:00:29,460 There is no suffering for the man from his wife 7 00:00:29,460 --> 00:00:34,060 The nature of this life is that it is not devoid of hardship 8 00:00:34,060 --> 00:00:38,259 But suffering differs from suffering 9 00:00:38,259 --> 00:00:40,759 There is temporary suffering 10 00:00:40,759 --> 00:00:43,759 There is constant suffering 11 00:00:43,759 --> 00:00:45,960 The most difficult and longest 12 00:00:45,960 --> 00:00:50,460 Suffering related to the character of a man or a woman 13 00:00:50,460 --> 00:00:55,560 The difficulty stems from a person's unwillingness to change his character 14 00:00:55,560 --> 00:00:58,289 And adapting to those around him 15 00:00:58,289 --> 00:00:59,390 Otherwise 16 00:00:59,390 --> 00:01:02,990 Every reprehensible creation is subject to change 17 00:01:03,090 --> 00:01:07,609 Whoever changes himself, God changes his conditions 18 00:01:07,609 --> 00:01:11,810 Some people may deny the possibility of changing morals 19 00:01:11,810 --> 00:01:14,810 Under the pretext that he was born with that 20 00:01:14,810 --> 00:01:16,310 And they say 21 00:01:16,310 --> 00:01:19,140 Imprinting prevails over imprinting 22 00:01:19,140 --> 00:01:21,340 He responds to this invitation 23 00:01:21,340 --> 00:01:24,140 Imam Al-Ghazali, may God have mercy on him 24 00:01:24,140 --> 00:01:25,540 And he says 25 00:01:25,540 --> 00:01:28,739 If morals do not accept change 26 00:01:28,739 --> 00:01:33,069 Commandments, sermons, and chastisements would have become invalid 27 00:01:33,069 --> 00:01:38,269 Al-Ghazali protests this statement with something else, saying: 28 00:01:38,269 --> 00:01:41,569 How can this be denied against humans? 29 00:01:41,569 --> 00:01:44,769 Changing the character of the animal is possible 30 00:01:44,769 --> 00:01:48,870 It transfers the goshawk from the Istihaash to the Anas 31 00:01:48,870 --> 00:01:51,170 The dog is a voracious eater 32 00:01:51,170 --> 00:01:54,569 To be polite, abstain, and let go 33 00:01:54,569 --> 00:01:56,469 And the horse is from the reins 34 00:01:56,469 --> 00:01:59,069 To smoothness and obedience 35 00:01:59,069 --> 00:02:02,269 All of this is a change in morals 36 00:02:04,099 --> 00:02:06,599 If this applies to animals 37 00:02:06,599 --> 00:02:11,759 In the human being whom God has honored with reason, first of all 38 00:02:11,759 --> 00:02:15,360 It is not valid to excuse the statement of the man or the woman 39 00:02:15,360 --> 00:02:16,960 This is my nature 40 00:02:16,960 --> 00:02:19,759 The good nature remains with him 41 00:02:19,759 --> 00:02:22,919 And bad temper changes 42 00:02:22,919 --> 00:02:27,419 What happened to us was the suffering of the first and second wives 43 00:02:27,419 --> 00:02:32,780 It's all due to bad temperaments in the man that he did not change 44 00:02:32,879 --> 00:02:35,580 This is the third suffering 45 00:02:35,580 --> 00:02:37,879 Narrated by the third woman 46 00:02:37,879 --> 00:02:39,379 So she says 47 00:02:39,379 --> 00:02:41,479 The lover's husband 48 00:02:41,479 --> 00:02:43,680 If I speak, I will release 49 00:02:43,680 --> 00:02:46,599 If I remain silent, I will comment 50 00:02:46,599 --> 00:02:52,199 Suffering indicates that a woman is not safe, neither in silence nor in conversation 51 00:02:52,199 --> 00:02:54,659 So what do you do? 52 00:02:54,659 --> 00:02:57,960 Abu Ubaid Al-Harawi, may God have mercy on him, said 53 00:02:57,960 --> 00:03:00,560 The long embrace 54 00:03:00,560 --> 00:03:02,689 Al-Asmai said 55 00:03:02,689 --> 00:03:03,889 She says 56 00:03:03,889 --> 00:03:07,490 He doesn't have more than his length without use 57 00:03:07,490 --> 00:03:11,090 If I mention his faults, he will divorce me 58 00:03:11,090 --> 00:03:13,990 If he was silent, he would leave me hanging 59 00:03:13,990 --> 00:03:18,770 Neither any nor the same as Baal 60 00:03:18,770 --> 00:03:22,870 This woman describes her husband as tall 61 00:03:22,870 --> 00:03:26,069 Is she praising him or disparaging him? 62 00:03:26,069 --> 00:03:29,069 The context of the speech indicates slander 63 00:03:29,069 --> 00:03:32,259 What do you mean by this word? 64 00:03:32,259 --> 00:03:34,759 Ibn Hajar, may God have mercy on him, said 65 00:03:34,759 --> 00:03:36,460 Al-Asmai said 66 00:03:36,460 --> 00:03:41,460 She wanted him not to have more than his height without benefit 67 00:03:41,460 --> 00:03:42,960 And someone else said 68 00:03:42,960 --> 00:03:45,360 It is a must-have length 69 00:03:45,360 --> 00:03:46,460 And it was said 70 00:03:46,460 --> 00:03:48,259 I described him at length 71 00:03:48,259 --> 00:03:52,050 Because length is mostly a guide to stupidity 72 00:03:52,050 --> 00:03:54,550 He also said, may God have mercy on him 73 00:03:54,550 --> 00:03:56,849 Abu Saeed Al-Dareer said 74 00:03:56,849 --> 00:03:58,050 The correct one 75 00:03:58,050 --> 00:03:59,550 That love 76 00:03:59,550 --> 00:04:01,550 The long and noble one 77 00:04:01,550 --> 00:04:03,550 He who owns his own affairs 78 00:04:03,550 --> 00:04:06,250 Women do not control it 79 00:04:06,250 --> 00:04:09,150 Rather, he rules over them as he wishes 80 00:04:09,150 --> 00:04:13,050 His wife is afraid to speak in his presence 81 00:04:13,050 --> 00:04:15,620 She is reluctantly silent 82 00:04:15,620 --> 00:04:17,420 Al-Zamakhshari said 83 00:04:17,420 --> 00:04:20,220 It is a serious complaint 84 00:04:20,220 --> 00:04:21,750 It's over 85 00:04:21,750 --> 00:04:25,449 This is supported by what happened in the narration of Yaqoub bin Al-Sakit 86 00:04:25,449 --> 00:04:27,949 From the increase at the end 87 00:04:27,949 --> 00:04:31,350 It is as disgusting as the tooth 88 00:04:31,350 --> 00:04:34,449 By opening the dictionary and tightening the lam 89 00:04:34,449 --> 00:04:37,649 That is, the abstract with its weight and meaning 90 00:04:37,649 --> 00:04:41,149 She indicates that she is wary of him 91 00:04:41,149 --> 00:04:44,149 It is possible that she wanted this 92 00:04:44,149 --> 00:04:47,449 He is reckless and cannot settle 93 00:04:47,449 --> 00:04:51,850 Like sharp teeth 94 00:04:51,850 --> 00:04:55,050 As for describing him as a fool, it is foolish 95 00:04:55,050 --> 00:04:57,550 This is clearly reprehensible 96 00:04:57,550 --> 00:05:01,850 The Arabs say that he has a view without an informant 97 00:05:01,850 --> 00:05:03,850 He sees boys as palm trees 98 00:05:03,850 --> 00:05:06,610 And you don't know what income is 99 00:05:06,610 --> 00:05:10,810 As for describing it as not being controlled by women 100 00:05:10,810 --> 00:05:13,209 This is one of the meanings of manhood 101 00:05:13,209 --> 00:05:15,410 It is not considered reprehensible 102 00:05:15,410 --> 00:05:17,410 And the context of her speech 103 00:05:17,410 --> 00:05:21,839 It indicates that she disparages him by describing him as being long 104 00:05:21,839 --> 00:05:23,439 The correct meaning 105 00:05:23,439 --> 00:05:26,639 That these kind of men have looks 106 00:05:26,639 --> 00:05:28,939 They have no informant 107 00:05:28,939 --> 00:05:30,339 Unfortunately 108 00:05:30,339 --> 00:05:34,139 Today, there are many young people who take care of their appearance 109 00:05:34,139 --> 00:05:37,339 To go out among the people in an elegant way 110 00:05:37,339 --> 00:05:39,639 If he speaks and speaks 111 00:05:39,639 --> 00:05:42,639 He showed you his little mind 112 00:05:42,639 --> 00:05:46,040 And until the man gets rid of this scourge 113 00:05:46,040 --> 00:05:50,240 He should have knowledge and culture that develop his mind 114 00:05:50,240 --> 00:05:53,939 Not just to develop his muscles 115 00:05:53,939 --> 00:05:55,839 And the biggest disaster 116 00:05:55,839 --> 00:05:57,839 If the husband and wife are busy 117 00:05:57,839 --> 00:06:00,439 What is called triviality today 118 00:06:00,439 --> 00:06:04,730 Marital life will collapse quickly 119 00:06:04,730 --> 00:06:08,029 And who looked at the lives of celebrities closely 120 00:06:08,029 --> 00:06:12,329 He found the misery and destruction that these people lived through 121 00:06:12,329 --> 00:06:16,129 Who deceive people with flashy appearances 122 00:06:16,129 --> 00:06:20,129 They sleep on the thorns of problems and differences 123 00:06:20,129 --> 00:06:23,930 Because his minds are preoccupied with trivial matters 124 00:06:23,930 --> 00:06:28,129 Most of his concern was the false portrayal of Al-Baraqa 125 00:06:28,129 --> 00:06:30,930 And publish it on social media 126 00:06:30,930 --> 00:06:34,819 To gain followers and gain fame 127 00:06:34,819 --> 00:06:37,620 This is not the only suffering 128 00:06:37,620 --> 00:06:40,620 Which she lived this time 129 00:06:40,620 --> 00:06:42,920 But there is other suffering 130 00:06:42,920 --> 00:06:45,420 She expressed it by saying: 131 00:06:45,420 --> 00:06:47,620 If I speak, I will release 132 00:06:47,620 --> 00:06:50,209 If I remain silent, I will comment 133 00:06:50,209 --> 00:06:52,910 Ibn Hajar, may God have mercy on him, said 134 00:06:52,910 --> 00:06:55,110 Which also appears to me 135 00:06:55,110 --> 00:06:58,910 She wanted to describe her bad condition to him 136 00:06:58,910 --> 00:07:01,310 She pointed out his bad character 137 00:07:01,310 --> 00:07:03,709 The potential promise of her words 138 00:07:03,709 --> 00:07:06,110 If she complains to him about her condition 139 00:07:06,110 --> 00:07:08,910 And she knew that when she mentioned it to him 140 00:07:08,910 --> 00:07:10,509 Nothing like that 141 00:07:10,509 --> 00:07:12,910 He took the initiative to divorce her 142 00:07:12,910 --> 00:07:14,910 It does not affect his divorce 143 00:07:14,910 --> 00:07:17,240 For her love in him 144 00:07:17,240 --> 00:07:19,839 Then I crossed the second sentence 145 00:07:19,839 --> 00:07:21,639 An indication that it is 146 00:07:21,639 --> 00:07:24,839 If she remains patient in this situation 147 00:07:24,839 --> 00:07:27,339 It was like a spoon to him 148 00:07:27,339 --> 00:07:32,500 Which does not have a husband or any 149 00:07:32,500 --> 00:07:35,300 She does not live with him in peace 150 00:07:35,300 --> 00:07:38,720 Rather, she lives in constant anxiety 151 00:07:38,720 --> 00:07:41,819 Judge Iyad, may God have mercy on him, said 152 00:07:41,819 --> 00:07:44,720 It fulfills everything I described 153 00:07:44,720 --> 00:07:47,120 Bad manners and bad behavior 154 00:07:47,120 --> 00:07:50,420 And she is not safe from harm or harm 155 00:07:50,420 --> 00:07:54,720 Moreover, it is reprehensible for women and people 156 00:07:54,720 --> 00:07:57,519 And she is wary of his company 157 00:07:57,519 --> 00:07:59,720 Not confident in myself 158 00:07:59,720 --> 00:08:02,519 And there is no stability for him 159 00:08:02,519 --> 00:08:05,920 Expecting his harm or separation 160 00:08:05,920 --> 00:08:09,319 She is with him as if he were on the same page 161 00:08:09,319 --> 00:08:11,620 Of fear and caution 162 00:08:11,620 --> 00:08:14,920 Lack of reassurance and stability 163 00:08:14,920 --> 00:08:16,920 The Arabs say who it is 164 00:08:16,920 --> 00:08:19,720 Cautious and unstable 165 00:08:19,720 --> 00:08:22,519 It's like the point of a spear 166 00:08:22,519 --> 00:08:24,519 Like the edge of a sword 167 00:08:24,519 --> 00:08:28,420 Like the horn of a gazelle 168 00:08:28,420 --> 00:08:30,420 An important issue for women 169 00:08:30,420 --> 00:08:32,419 In her married life 170 00:08:32,419 --> 00:08:36,620 To feel safe and stable with her husband 171 00:08:36,620 --> 00:08:39,019 This woman does not know security 172 00:08:39,019 --> 00:08:40,720 Nor stability 173 00:08:40,720 --> 00:08:43,620 Because the husband does not accept her words 174 00:08:43,620 --> 00:08:47,019 He threatens her with divorce if she speaks 175 00:08:47,019 --> 00:08:51,240 If she remained silent, she would live with him in suspense 176 00:08:51,240 --> 00:08:52,740 And God Almighty 177 00:08:52,740 --> 00:08:54,740 He forbade men from harming women 178 00:08:54,840 --> 00:08:57,840 By suspending it in married life 179 00:08:57,840 --> 00:09:00,840 She is neither a wife nor divorced 180 00:09:00,840 --> 00:09:02,840 And he said 181 00:09:02,840 --> 00:09:08,840 And you will not be able to treat women justly, even if you strive. 182 00:09:08,840 --> 00:09:15,159 So do not incline completely, lest you leave it hanging 183 00:09:15,159 --> 00:09:17,159 Al-Saadi, may God have mercy on him, said 184 00:09:17,159 --> 00:09:20,159 If the wife leaves her husband 185 00:09:20,159 --> 00:09:22,159 What she should 186 00:09:22,259 --> 00:09:25,259 She became like a hanging woman who has no husband 187 00:09:25,259 --> 00:09:28,259 She rests and prepares for marriage 188 00:09:28,259 --> 00:09:32,259 She does not have a husband who can fulfill her rights 189 00:09:34,159 --> 00:09:37,159 The woman's comment is very supportive of her 190 00:09:37,159 --> 00:09:43,159 Because marital life is based on the legal relationship between the spouses 191 00:09:43,159 --> 00:09:47,159 If the husband fails to keep the woman chaste 192 00:09:47,159 --> 00:09:49,159 It exposes her to temptation 193 00:09:49,159 --> 00:09:52,159 Especially in a time like this 194 00:09:52,259 --> 00:09:57,259 In which women interact with men in many jobs 195 00:09:57,259 --> 00:10:00,450 The words of the third woman indicate 196 00:10:00,450 --> 00:10:04,450 However, she loves her husband and does not want anyone else 197 00:10:04,450 --> 00:10:06,450 Because if she hates it 198 00:10:06,450 --> 00:10:10,450 I would have spoken and pointed out his faults so he would divorce her 199 00:10:10,450 --> 00:10:14,450 But she preferred to remain silent rather than speak 200 00:10:14,450 --> 00:10:17,450 Although silence is also permitted 201 00:10:17,450 --> 00:10:19,450 Because it will remain suspended 202 00:10:19,549 --> 00:10:25,549 She does not get from married life what other women get 203 00:10:25,549 --> 00:10:27,549 Except rarely 204 00:10:27,549 --> 00:10:32,809 However, she chose to stay with him because of her love for him 205 00:10:32,809 --> 00:10:36,809 Can a man appreciate this love that a woman has for him? 206 00:10:36,809 --> 00:10:39,809 With the severity of his abuse of her 207 00:10:39,809 --> 00:10:43,809 Will he reconsider his lifestyle with his wife? 208 00:10:43,809 --> 00:10:49,500 We will continue in an upcoming meeting, God willing 209 00:10:49,500 --> 00:10:52,600 Praise be to God, Lord of the worlds